Ponder and i wonder...

Feeling a bit weird now.

Lunch was good. Saw this Guess handbag that i like
and it's like 90 bucks! oh man... i jus got my allowance eh...control...

sigh, i'm feeling quite apprehensive bout meeting him tonight. Shall
i jus cancel? But then again, aiyah...dunno la...

well, i know my princess is not in the best of moods too... cheer up k babe!

I'm feeling sleepy now, just want my bed... it's raining out there, just like
it is in my heart...

*listen to the rhythm of the fallin rain... wondering now just what a fool i've been...*

Day-dreaming

Yupz, here i am, sitting and stoning in boredom again...
miss mah princess and her crap...
hope she's feeling fine today.

Will be seeing Mr.C later. let's pray it doesn't turn disastrous...

My mind's confused, spinning round and round... what did i get myself into?

*Time allows the opportunity for thought and remenisence*

Early morning there's a halo hanging....

"If I die before I wake
at least in heaven I can skate
cause right now on earth I cant do jack
without the man up on my back

now heaven would be a dj
spinning dub all night long
and heaven would just kickin back
with jesus packing my bong
and if you dont believe in Jesus and muhammad and budha too
and while the world is warring
just sit back and laugh at you singing..."

Haha! Morning morning! It's Thhhuuurrsssday! Yeah! Another day closer to the weekend!
Well, this song jus kept ringing in my head since i woke... hmmm, hint about smthing?

Well, went to watch BE COOL yesterday with boon... it was good, yeah, "chill my man, be cool" haha... stupid nigger wannabes... went to chill at Flappers afterthat, had booze and played pool, slendid combination!

Kinda having a bit of prob at home so i guess having his company was good. It just makes me feel happy.

Today started off on a good note, though nothing special happend but i just think it's gonna be a great day!

My dough is in, so...ehem.. shopping anyone? ahaha...


*I'm gonna twist out cause I got the skillz..got the skillz got the skillz*

Mid-week...

Yeah! It's wednesday already! Oh man... look so forward to the weekend. gee, hopefully if there's nothing on on sat or sun den i can make my way to the beach!

Anyway, yesterday saw me going for my Peranakan meeting after work, meet Reggie, damn funny gay... he's nice la, prob one of the few i can laugh with. Then it was to meridian to play pool with boon and ed, my skills are getting better man!

went down to Spenelli after that only to realise they were closed *pff*

Then it was back home cuz i was real shag already! And poor ah boon kenna road block... and they kept him for like an hour man! outrages... singapore traffic police...

Just had my yummilicious chicken pie prepared by my wonderful mummy!
Think i'm feeling happy today...yeah... =)

*I just got this feeling... deep inside of me...*

Brrgghhh....

It must be turning into the north pole here in the office... or like what my dearest vonnie calls the "ice box"...
it jus rained so the air con is freaking cold...brrrgghh....
Mr.S just brought his sweater down for me... so sweet right... *grins*

Finally...

The 28th March has marked my increase in tolerance and endurance...

-Made my new specs
-Got a new card holder (which i think is damn nice)
-Vonnie finally did her thinggy...so proud of her man!
-I had mine done too... hee... it's painful but it sure is nice!
-Met Seb for dessert @ Hoi Lao San
-Think he muz have gotten a shock at what i did
-I realise that i have run out of dough...again...sigh...
-Found out that that stupid felle has announced to the world that we've broken up. What the hell is he up to man! He could even tell me that he was flirting arnd and if i shld see him holding another girl's hands, that he hoped i would not hate him. Possible? Unlikely. I really pity those girls that are going out with him now... let's just hope he'll be a gentleman and stop all this childish stuff. How could one just change into such a horrendous character...? Still love him... but it's not possible anymore.

*The caterpillar has evolved into a beautiful butterfly and now it's free...*

Long Weekend... not so long after all...

Gee, it's the monday blues again... hmmm, why isn't it green, or red, or yellow? (fine, tt was lame)

Anyway, the weekend wasn't such a bad one after all considering that i got to take the RedBull beetle home for 2 nights in a row! What a responsibility is was k...

Friday:
Collected the car from Alaina after watching Ms Congeniality 2, then went to chiong with Von @ Black. Drove down to the club since it was quite late already... Met lotsa pple there, including mer and company. The night was fun, as usual, with my buddy.

Sat:
Had to wake early for work at RedBull... late, as usual. It's either a prob with the alarm, or it's just me. Hmm. Had a big screw up at the event...sigh, shall not talk about it, too long a story... But anyway, there was this really cute atheletic guy... oh man... he looked younger than we thought! He's 21! Hahaha... *eye candy*
Rushed down to church after that, super long mass.
Chilled @ Daryl's place after that... super funny guy. Sasi was there too... damn lame bunch.

Sunday:
Woke early for church then it was to work again! Picked Vonnie from Suntec and proceeded for work. Was kinda sian yesterday as the race was already over by the time we got there, so not many pple to sample. Went down to holland v to slack after that. Oh ya, there was this guy holding a Parang! Freaked the hell outta us! Got back to office then went for a session of Pool @ Meridian. Nana... sigh... it was only one game wat... haha...
Then it was dinner then back home. Real tired, needed sleep badly.

Colin called, we spoke, bout many things. I think i'm learning to take things in stride already, didn't feel as pissed... hee... it was nice hearing him call me "dumb-bell" again... but then again... it can only be left to memories...

Slept @ bout 130... zzzzzzz....

Monday:
Well, of course i'm in the office now, feeling bored as usual. Bored not because i've got nothing to do but there's so much to be done... *stares*
Just had breakfast prepared by my wonderful mummy! nice nice...

Mr.S is coming to meet me for lunch later... so sweet of him. *smilez*
And i'm going out with Vonnie tonight! Yeah!

*The world jus goes round and round*

Today's better...

*laughter laughter laughter*

I think i'm going mad. It's like a 4-day week this week! yippi!
Somebody's finally booking out today...hee...*giggles*

Gonna be real busy over the weekend, church and stuff. Think i'm gonna sink into tired mode again soon. The Peranakan thinggy is gonna take up my time too... hmmm...wonder if i'd get to rest...

Am freaking cold now in the office though i'm in long sleeves... they think it's winterland or what?

Finally gonna see my princess again tmr...hope it's a night of fun again!
I'm just feeling happy all over again... and i wonder why...hmmm...


*Sometimes it's just better if you let it all go*

why?

Why doesn't the pain go away...?
Why do the memories of him and me still float in my head?
Why can't i be emotionally stronger? He doesn't love me anymore anyway.
Why can't we turn back time?
Why did it have to end this way?
Why did we meet in the frist place?
Why did we fall in love...?
Why do we now go our seperate ways?
Why did a love so strong just whither away...?

*God knows...cuz God is watching...*

Frightful...

Yesterday night marked the worst night in this new year.

My life's been upside down ever since we broke up and i guess it's just human nature to not be able to forget so quickly. I realised that that is not the case for some people.
Barely 3 weeks after we've broken up and he's seeing someone else. "I need time"... that has now become utter bullshit. To say you love someone and to be holding another girl in his arms! F**k off!

I don't know if i should be sad, disappointed or what should i be feeling? I was totally shattered... cried my heart out. I thought we could give the relationship another chance. After yesterday, i know now that it's time to move on.

Happy memories we've shared and i'll always cherish. I never wanna see the face of the one i once called "sweetheart"... it's just too painful, maybe it'll be easier to let go like this.

Reading all the e-mails and testimonials, we were once such a flawless couple. Did we give in to temptation?

He told me that he went out with those girls so that he could get over this matter. What the hell was he thinking??!!! I thought that loving someone would be to give time, to wait, to think about how much you need each other... and there he was, seeking pleasure in some other girl from China Black. Bitch.

I never did anything when i went out with Seb, i begged for a chance, he wrote me off.
I was so happy to see him yesterday, but it all turned out to be the greatest mistake i've ever made in my life. To love someone so deeply who has now turned into a bastard. Time brings about changes, why did it have to end this way?

I wish him the best... really, that he'll find someone more worthy of him.

*Live not to regret... i've regretted*

Tuesday...

Here i am, bogged down with piles of work again.
Just finished one of the many reports... thank goodness it's only a 4-day week!

Met Vonnie for dinner yesterday, salad was good. Miss going out with friends so much man!

Gonna have meeting after work, oh man, why can't i just rest... will be meeting Mr.C for awhile later... hope all will be fine.

Am going shopping for shoes! The shoe i'm wearing today hurts man... think my feet expanded or something... weird.

*Is it just me or is it just me*

The day started with the early morning routine of getting up early again... haven't been getting much slp lately. I think i really need rest. Went for ice cream with godma yesterday nite, got some drinks cuz wanted to do up our own mixers at home... i dozed off... geez...

Spent almost the whole day in church, saw Diana with Gerald... they looked so happy... kinda envious... or is it jealousy... (God knows...) Had some prob at home... sigh...

CY picked me up to go collect the photos, "phew wheet!" so nice!
Went to Pasta Fresca for dinner...so sinful... swear i should stop pigging out like this... Had ice cream after that... it was yummilicious!

Back to korkor's place to meet mummy...

*Sometimes the world just tires you out...agree?*

Why do i feel this way...

Long day it has been... worked at Redbull since morning. Took a cab to work cuz couldn't get up... and like why? Friday night saw me clubbing at Newsroom bar with mah colleagues, my supervisor, and summer! Bunch of uncles... drink drink drink... left me and summer on the dance floor only! So... we decided to proceed down to CB... And so the fun continued till bout 4plus... someone booked out, suppose to come fetch me but ended up scolding me cuz he was over exhausted... rubbish. Got to know Jeremy, nice guy. Mer's fren's fren sent us home thereafter. Time to sleep: 530am.

Got up this morning feeling like a zombie, but fortunately i was ok for work. Sampled at Sentosa today... Golfers are tickos!

Drove back to give Alaina the car, Mr. S picked me up and we went down to East Coast for pasta. Dinner was good. He had to rush back to camp and so ya, it's gonna be awhile till i see him again.

Everyone's packed with something tonight, so here i am with my blog and i... typing the night away. Everytime i think of Colin, my heart feels the pierce. I forgave, why couldn't he.

I think of him, but in a different light... things have changed... i must move on...

*Sometimes i just feel like running away...from the reality that we live in*

Good to be home.

Boo!

Ever wonder how it feels like to be home early? well, that's how i'm feeling now... happy and all..

Met Vonnie after work, went down to far east to do a lil' shopping... (a lil' only la) and i spent a bomb while waitin for her! oh man... i need to learn how to save... i'm becoming poor again...

Had cheese sausage for dinner, it was salty, but it was good. Walked around somemore... Vonnie got her watch that was "class"... hee...

Tot i'd save some money, so i walked home from Khatib. It wasn't too bad... good time-out to recollect the day's happenings...

Now i'm comfortably at home and i'm gonna hang up my monkey! yeah yeah! it's sooooo cute!

Lalalalala... I miss him...

*It's the thought that counts... sometimes*

Long wait...

Well well well...

work's been treating me good, i guess...

just got to know Kay Lee a bit better... nice chap i reckon.

princess vonnie's not feeling well, so i guess there ain't no clubbing for me this week.

gotta work on sat... oh man, why do i have the feeling i'm gonna be missing slp again...

i miss my sunshine, if ya know what i mean.

Monday blues...

Gee, it's Monday and it's back to work again...so dreadful, but i guess it's part and parcel of life.

Alright, let's start from Friday.
Worked in the day and then went to church for some vigil thinggy. Took a cab down to meet vonnie at CB. There was Ter, CY, Joel and KokPeng. Adrian was there to celebrate his birthday too. Drank like nobody's business... got a bit drunk thereafter. Went for supper at Macpherson cuz it was on the way to von's place. Stayed over, did i mention that her bed was real comfy? hee... Time to bed: 530am.

Saturday.
Time outta bed: 730am.
Ok, this muz be mad, we only had like 2hrs of sleep and we're up and preparing for work at Redbull! Had this event at Kallang, it was so cool... treasure hunting on wheels! And like why didn't we know bout it? otherwise we could have joined! Met Leee Meng there.. wat a conincidence. Felt kinda tired after so we decided to go down to TCC to chill out for lunch. Louis came by to fetch vonnie and so of course gave me a lift back. Had to get out of the house again after preparing for the Redbull Formula 1 party at Thumpers! ok, i was about to faint... the people there were like... crazy and old... hmmm...met Darren and Wildon, cute guys from NTU and SMU, single and available... =)

Sunday.
Time out: 830am.
Church in the morning then practice for Easter in the afternoon. Was so tired man! Went to watch Son of the Mask... what a stupid show. Got down to East Coast to chill before meeting kor and mummy for dinner.

Time home: 1030.
As i lay on my bed (yes, i was on my bed before 11pm!), went thru smses, thought about the day's happenings... my eyes shut and i was in lala land... what a bliss...

And of course, i'm in my office now, feeling bored as usual... guess i will survive.
my nose's stuck and think i'm falling sick... what a shitty feeling...

*Do you even realise the things that happen in your life
happen for a reason?*

TGIF...

Wow, finally the weekend is here! but then again... i'm still busy.

Working RedBull tmr at 9am and i'm clubbing tonight... can't believe myself. Am aching from yesterday's martial arts. *faints*

Had this super, super expensive chicken pie from DOME this morning... can't believe it eh... it was like $4.20!

Work's fine, i'm still alive in the pile of work, just can't wait for 15 of April to come!

Am gonna leave the office soon, gonna meet korkor at Compasspoint... i'm going to church for your info. =)

Hope i get mummy's speech done soon... i'm like left with... NO TIME!

"Love is never complete when u're not living it"

Third of the day...

Work was shitty today...

Went for kickboxing with princess von and we survived it!

Think i'm shag and very tired.

I need sleep, my bed's calling.

"It's mind over matter"

Gloomy afternoon...

yes, here i am on a glommy, sleepy Thursday afternoon...

Jus had lunch, it was fulfilling.

Just feeling so weird all of a sudden...

why?

Almost perfect.

Hey hey!

It was a wonderful evening last night. Karen's a year older now and so will i be in a few months time... sigh... (hitting the "2" already!)

Vonnie went off early, had to be up for work and have enough energy for our kick-boxing lesson! yes, that's right, we're taking it on!

It felt so good to be dancing again, without any restrictions. Met Mr. Kong there too.

The scholl function was a total flop, boring as usual... what could we expect? me and princess darling fell asleep almost immediately.

Well, as usual, some people just never fail to piss me off. sigh... i forgive...

Today's a great day cuz it's a good hair day and hopefully i get all my work done then i don't have to worry bout tmr!

yup yup, this week's gonna be exciting...

oh ya, he msged me again... hmmm, did i mention that he's changed? a whole lot. Can't believe what he did to me in the canteen. Like totally...

"What goes around comes around"

Starting all over...

It's a new blog, new entrie, and a whole package of a brand new me.

Got my hair cut on Monday, gee, i love it! 3 yrs ago saw me don this hairstyle, i'm happy, all over again.

Going down to CB with von, alaina and karen tonight. Hope it'll be fun!

He dropped me msges, but it's those that i dread to read... makes me cry in the mornings... i miss him... really do...

Well, life's just full of uncertainties...

"Take this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity"... That was in the past... I realise now that we live in the present.

I love my life and that's how i'm gonna live it!